How the Sandwich Generation Can Protect Their Retirement

Woman part of the sandwich generation

For those who are caring for their aging parents and raising kids at the same time, it can often seem like there’s never enough time, money, or energy to provide for all the family members who need you. In particular, handling finances when two different generations are relying on you can feel like an impossible balancing act — not to mention an exercise in feeling guilty no matter what you do.

But being the caregiver sandwiched between two generations makes it even more important for you to prioritize your own financial needs, especially when it comes to retirement planning. By protecting your retirement during this difficult season of your life, you’ll be in a better place to remain independent as you age, launch your kids into a more secure adulthood, and offer ongoing support to your parents.

Sound impossible? It’s not. Here’s how you can protect your retirement if you’re a member of the sandwich generation.

Retirement savings comes first

Retirement savings should get priority ahead of putting money into your kids’ college funds. You know that already. Your kids can take on loans for college, but there are no loans available to pay for your retirement.

The more difficult decision is prioritizing retirement savings ahead of paying for long-term care for your parents. That can feel like a heartless choice, but it is a necessary one to keep from passing money problems from one generation to the next. Forgoing your retirement savings during your 40s and 50s means you’ll miss out on long-term growth and the benefits of compound interest. By making sure that you continue to set aside money for retirement, you can make sure your kids won’t feel financially squeezed as you get older.

Instead of personally bankrolling your parents’ care, use their assets for as long as they last. That will not only allow you to make the best use of programs like Medicaid (which requires long-term care recipients to have exhausted their own assets before it kicks in), but it will also protect your future.

Communication is key

Part of the stress of being in the sandwich generation is feeling like the financial burdens of two generations (as well as your own) are resting entirely on your shoulders. You feel like you’ll be letting down the vulnerable people you love if you can’t do it all. But the truth is that you can’t do it all. And you shouldn’t expect that of yourself, nor should your family expect it of you. So communicating with your loved ones about what they can expect can help you draw important boundaries around what you’re able to offer them.

This conversation will be somewhat simpler with your children. You can let them know what kind of financial help they can expect from you for college and beyond, and simply leave it at that.

The conversation is a little tougher with your parents, in part because you need to ask them about nitty-gritty details about their finances. Whether or not money is a taboo subject in your family, it can be tough for your parents to let you in on important financial conversations — to them it feels like they were changing your diapers only a few short years ago.

Being in the loop on what your parents have saved, where it is, what plans they have for the future, and who they trust as their financial adviser, will help protect their money and yours. You’ll be better able to make decisions for them in case of an emergency, and being included in financial decisions means you can help protect them from scams. (See also: 5 Money Strategies for the Sandwich Generation)

Insurance is a necessity

Having adequate disability insurance in place is an important fail-safe for any worker, but it’s especially important for those who are caring for aging parents and young children. The Council for Disability Awareness reports that nearly one in four workers will be out of work for at least a year because of a disabling condition. With parents and children counting on your income, even a short-term disability could spell disaster, and force you to dip into your retirement savings to keep things going. Making sure you have sufficient disability income insurance coverage can help make sure you protect your family and your retirement if you become disabled.

Life insurance is another area where you don’t want to skimp. With two generations counting on you, it’s important to have enough life insurance to make sure your family will be okay if something happens to you. This is true even if you’re a full-time unpaid caregiver for either your parents or your children, since your family will need to pay for the care you provide even if they aren’t counting on your income.

It’s also a good idea to talk to your parents about life insurance for them, if they’re able to qualify. For aging parents who know they will draw down their assets for long-term care, a life insurance policy can be a savvy way to ensure they leave some kind of inheritance. If your parents are anxious about their ability to leave an inheritance, a life insurance policy can help to relieve that money stress and potentially make it emotionally easier for them to draw down their own assets.

Become a Social Security and Medicare expert

Spending time reading up on Social Security, Medicare, and other programs can help you to make better financial decisions for your parents and yourself. There are a number of misconceptions, myths, and misunderstandings masquerading as facts about these programs, and knowing exactly what your parents (and eventually you) will be entitled to can help make sure you don’t leave money on the table or make decisions based on bad information.

The eligibility questionnaires at benefits.gov can help you determine what benefits are available and whether your parents qualify. In addition, it’s a good idea to sign up for a my Social Security account for yourself. This site will provide you with personalized estimates of future benefits based on your lifetime earnings, which can better help you prepare for your own retirement.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help

Caring for children and parents at the same time is exhausting. Don’t compound the problem by thinking you have to make financial decisions all by yourself. Consider interviewing and hiring a financial adviser to help you make sense of the tough choices. He or she can help you figure out the best way to preserve your assets, help your parents enjoy their twilight years with dignity, and plan for your children’s future.

Even if a traditional financial adviser isn’t in the cards for you, don’t forget that you can ask for help among your extended family and network of friends. There’s no need to pretend that juggling it all is easy. Family can potentially offer financial or caregiving support. Knowledgeable friends can steer you toward the best resources to help you make decisions. Relying on your network means you’re less likely to burn out and make disordered financial decisions. (See also: 9 Simple Acts of Self-Care for the Sandwich Generation)

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Are you part of the sandwich generation? When you are a caregiver to children as well as aging parents, it can seem like theres not enough time, money or energy to provide for all the family members. Here are the tips and ideas on how you can protect your retirement finances. | #sandwichgeneration #personalfinance #moneymatters


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8 Essential Rules for Surviving Financial Hardship

At some point, most people experience an unexpected crisis that shakes their financial world. It could be losing a job, receiving a huge medical bill, or having a car break down at the worst possible time. But surviving a pandemic is a situation you probably never thought you would face.

No matter what challenge you’re facing, you’re not the first.

Along with the public health toll, the COVID crisis has put millions of people out of work. For those struggling financially, here are eight critical rules to help you manage money wisely, stretch your resources, and bounce back from this unprecedented health and economic disaster.

8 rules for managing a financial hardship

Here are the details about each rule to manage a financial setback during the coronavirus crisis.

Rule #1: Accept your situation and use your resources to seek help

The key to successfully navigating a financial setback is to be realistic. If you’re in denial and don’t face money troubles head-on, you can quickly compound the damage.

Instead of focusing on the problem, getting angry, or letting stress overwhelm you, channel your emotions into finding solutions. Start talking about your challenges with people and professionals you trust, such as a money-savvy family member, financial advisor, legitimate credit counselor, or an attorney.

Instead of focusing on the problem, getting angry, or letting stress overwhelm you, channel your emotions into finding solutions.

The following financial associations have certified volunteers who can offer free help and advice:

  • National Association of Personal Financial Advisors
  • The Financial Planning Association
  • Association for Financial Counseling & Planning Education

Rule #2: Get a bird’s eye view of your finances

To fully understand your situation, create a list of what you own and owe; this is called a net worth statement. Compiling your data in one place helps you evaluate your financial resources, make decisions more efficiently, and have essential information at your fingertips if creditors or advisors ask for it.

First, list your assets: 

  • Cash
  • Investments
  • Retirement accounts
  • Real estate
  • Vehicles 

Then list your liabilities:

  • Mortgage
  • Car loans
  • Student loans
  • Credit card debt

Include the estimated values of your assets, the balances on your debts, and the interest rates you pay for each liability. You could jot down this information on paper, enter it in a computer spreadsheet, or create a report using money management software.

When you subtract your total liabilities from your total assets, you’ve calculated your net worth, which is an indicator of your financial health. It’s not uncommon to have a low or negative net worth when you’re in financial trouble.

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Rule #3: Understand your cash flow

An essential part of bouncing back from a financial crisis is keeping an eye on your monthly income and expenses. Create a cash flow statement that lists your expected income and typical expenses, such as rent, utilities, food, prescriptions, transportation, and insurance. Again, you can create this report manually or by using budgeting features in a financial program.

Understanding where your money goes is the only way to prioritize expenses and cut all non-essential spending.

Understanding where your money goes is the only way to prioritize expenses and cut all non-essential spending. Making temporary sacrifices will help you recover as quickly as possible with less long-term damage to your finances.

Rule #4: Shop your essential expenses

As you review your spending, it’s an excellent time to comparison-shop your essential expenses. Evaluate your highest costs first, such as housing, vehicles, and insurance, since they offer the most significant potential savings.

For instance, you may be able to move into a less expensive home, purchase or lease a cheaper vehicle, and shop your auto insurance to find better deals. Ask your utility provider about assistance programs that offer energy-saving improvements at no charge.

Rule #5: Communicate with your creditors

If you haven’t been in contact with your creditors, start a dialog with each one immediately. You’ll come out ahead and get favorable treatment from creditors if you are proactive and honest about your financial troubles. Ask them for solutions, such as deferring payments for several months, setting up a reduced payment plan, or refinancing a loan to reduce your financial burden.

You’ll come out ahead and get favorable treatment from creditors if you are proactive and honest about your financial troubles.

Creditors are likely to ask about details regarding your financial situation, so have your net worth and cash flow statements on hand when you speak to them. Be ready to complete any required assistance applications quickly.

Rule #6: Prioritize your debts carefully

Based on guidance from creditors and finance professionals, prioritize your bills and debts carefully. Your goal should be to conserve as much cash as possible without skipping essential payments. Always pay for necessities first: food, prescription drugs, and auto insurance.

Debts related to child support and legal judgments have severe consequences and should be prioritized

Use your net worth statement to rank your liabilities from highest to lowest priority. For instance, debts related to child support and legal judgments have severe consequences and should be prioritized. Keeping up with an auto loan is a high priority if you rely on your vehicle for transportation. Federal student loans are in automatic forbearance through September 30, and the relief may get extended through 2020.

Your unsecured debts—medical bills, credit cards, and private student loans—are lower priorities. Never pay these debts ahead of rent, a mortgage, or utilities when you have a cash shortage.

Rule #7: Don’t let collectors force you to make bad decisions

Prioritizing your debts means some may be paid late or not at all. If a debt collector contacts you about a low-priority debt, such as a medical bill or credit card, don’t allow them to persuade you to pay it before your highest priority bills.

Collectors may try various aggressive tactics, such as threatening to sue you or ruin your credit. A lawsuit could take years, and a creditor is more likely to negotiate a settlement with you. Remember that a creditor or collector can’t send you to jail for civil debts.

If you are behind on bills, that fact is likely already reflected on your credit reports. By the time a collector contacts you, the damage is already done, and paying the bill won’t improve your credit in the short-term.

Rule #8: Take advantage of local and federal benefits

If your income and savings have entirely dried up, use these resources to learn more about local and federal benefits.

  • FeedingAmerica.org has a map showing local food banks
  • Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) is the federal food program you may qualify for based on where you live, your income, and family size
  • MakingHomeAffordable.gov can help you find a housing counselor or see if your mortgage is backed by the federal government and qualifies for forbearance
  • Benefits.gov has a questionnaire that helps you discover the benefits you’re eligible for
  • Medicaid.gov is the federal health insurance program you may qualify for based on where you live, your income, and family size
  • Healthcare.gov is the federal health insurance marketplace where you may find plans with substantial subsidies if you earn too much to qualify for Medicaid

Financial challenges can cause you and your family to experience a flood of emotions, including anger, fear, and embarrassment. As difficult as it might be to put a financial crisis into perspective, it’s critical. No matter what challenge you’re facing, you’re not the first. There are millions of people who are dealing with COVID-related financial hardships.

Face the fact that your recovery could take a while. Do everything in your power to manage your budget wisely by getting organized, seeking ways to earn more, and spending less. Don’t be afraid to ask for help from creditors, seek free advice from professionals, and take advantage of every local and federal benefit possible.

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